Your Father wipes away your faults as easily as an earthly father wipes mud off a child’s face. The worst thing you can do is to doubt God’s love. He knows your heart and sees that you wished to do no wrong. It is all right to see how “weak and helpless” you are, but that is no place to stay. (2nd Cor. 12:10 Amp. So for the sake of Christ, I am well pleased and take pleasure in infirmities, insults, hardships, persecutions, perplexities and distresses; for When I am weak [in human strength], then am I [truly] strong (able, powerful in divine strength).
Do you torment yourself because you do not always feel that you trust Him or feel His presence with you? Walk by faith and not by sight or by your own expectations. Let us walk together closely – not according to what we “want”, but according to what God chooses for us. Allow yourself to sink down under the weight of the cross and be ready to bear humiliation and suffering which is necessary to purify you. By allowing yourself to be pressed down, you will find that this truly raises you up. Give up everything to be known by Him.
We must understand that death to our self-love is a long, lengthy, painful, bloody process. Being willing to bear this weight of the cross and suffer this type of humiliation is what raises us up into the higher life with Jesus. Our suffering is in giving up our self-life to God for the sake of His Kingdom. For those who choose and allow this death to self process to take place, depending totally on Holy Spirit’s grace, the pain is much less than for those who attempt to rescue and save themselves through their own good works and self-effort. Our level of authority in His Kingdom will mirror or reflect exactly our level of surrender.